So it’s been a few days since I got the letter stating that my divorce was final. Some trusted that I was okay; others, I believe, waited for “the other shoe to drop.” I said then, that I was okay, and I’m still saying now that I’M OKAY. What most people don’t know, or understand, is that while there is a grieving process to all loss, whether it is the death of a loved one, loss of a job or home, or the end of a marriage, grieving can occur at any time.
For me, personally, my grieving time came during my marriage. I know many people don’t start their grieving until the end of their marriage, or when the ink is fresh on the divorce papers, but that wasn’t the case for me. I started grieving years before the official end of my marriage. In spite of my hopes, dreams, and prayers that my marriage would be saved, I saw signs of THE END throughout my marriage–and the second separation was a definite sign, even if I wanted to ignore all the others. So I went through the grieving process, and went through most of the stages…a few times. And this is why I refer to my grieving as GOOD grief, because while I was praying for one thing, the Lord helped me to clearly see what I needed to see and understand, which allowed me the opportunity to start grieving early. The Lord, while He didn’t save my marriage, saved me from having to go “cold turkey” and I am grateful for that.